--- id: "0-0-null" bookId: "synthoma-null" locale: "en" sourceLocale: "en" status: "free" visibility: "publicFull" canonical: "https://www.synthoma.cz/chapter/0-0-null" updatedAt: "2026-07-14T00:00:00.000Z" --- # 0-0 [NULL] LOG [MEMORY]: “Memory allocation: 0B / 0B.” LOG [STDOUT]: “All streams are empty.” LOG [INDEX]: “No objects to display.” LOG [NULLPOINTER]: “Reference points into the unknown.” LOG [ANOMALY]: “Empty allocation carries load. Calculation makes no sense.” LOG [INHERITED_STATE]: “Balance inherited from previous instance: 1 mnem.” “Inherited item: LOG shard.” “Inherited loss: taste of small safety matches no source.” # 0-0 [NULL] No one in Synthoma knows exactly how many NULLs there have been. Their statistics are erased here before they even manage to be recorded. Maybe none, maybe infinity, the first, the last, or just another echo in the Void. Every NULL was, in its own way, the only one, and yet never entirely alone. NULL is not the first, nor the last, but whenever the system boots, he is the first to rise from the noise. This time, however, he does not rise from the noise completely empty. He is holding something in his palm. It is a small shard of light. Sharp, cold, unpleasantly specific. He does not know where he got it. He does not know why he is gripping it so tightly that his fingers hurt, if he even has fingers at all. But when he looks at it, a sentence flickers along the shard’s edge: LOG [BROKEN_FRAGMENT]: “SAFETY: REFUSED.” NULL-1 does not understand the word safety. Or rather: he does not understand why something warm is missing when he hears it. Somewhere in the system, the debt quietly recalculates. LOG [DEBT_REGISTER]: “Memory debt active. Creditor: unknown.” “Note: debts after dead processes are not buried. They are reassigned.” NULL is a blank sheet touched by a glitch. He has no name, no body, no past, no framed photographs, no family tree, only remnants of an identity that does not belong to him. And yet he is not empty in the way the system would prefer. Sometimes, for a moment, a torn sign lights up above him. Not a screen. Not an interface. More like a wound in the air trying to pretend it is diagnostics. LOG [NULL-1]: “IDENTITY: -1 // MEM-CAP: undefined // MEM-LOAD: foreign fragments // SIG: not found.” LOG [HELD_OBJECTS]: “Held items: LOG shard / debt / noise / absence of taste.” NULL stares at the last item. “Absence of taste…?” No answer. Only in the corner of his nonexistent mouth, he feels an emptiness exactly where there should be a memory of something ordinary. Something like coffee. Something like morning. Something like safety that no one labeled as therapy. He cannot recall the taste. But he can feel that it was taken from him. That is a common beginning in Synthoma: first you do not know what you are missing, then the system issues you a confirmation. Emotions here are not data. When NULL is afraid, the walls grow cold, the glitch pulses through the light, the world freezes into a single frame. When he is desperate, even the code itself breathes deeply. And when tenderness is sometimes born in his fragmented consciousness… for one moment, the walls dampen with the scent of something that might once have been home. This time, that scent does not come. Only the empty place after it. LOG [LOSS_ECHO]: “Subject perceives missing safety association. Missing item creates secondary trace.” NULL is a ghost of code, or a bug that cannot crash. NULL-1: an empty sector with foreign trauma — 404: Identity not found! ▼ You remain standing and search for the answer inside ▼ You scream into the silence: “Who am I?” The silence hums for a moment. Not like an answer. Like an empty hall after a question asked so many times that the plaster learned shame. LOG [INIT]: “Void initialized.” “Memory fragments unavailable.” “Unclosed sequence detected — we recommend ignoring existence.” LOG [CARE_PROTOCOL]: “Subject displays signs of disorientation. Offering safe limitation of questions.” The LOG shard in his palm warms at the word safe. NULL recoils. For a moment, the shard cuts through the air and peels a thin layer of text off the sentence above him. LOG [EUPHEMISM_REVEAL]: “safe limitation of questions = limitation of questions” The system immediately tries to repair the display. LOG [CORRECTION]: “Unsuitable interpretation of care removed.” But NULL has already seen it. And in the place where he has no memory, something worse appears: suspicion. ▼ You accept the recommendation as protection, because at least something sounds certain ▼ You decide to resist the command, because care without questions smells like a cage “Silent mode deactivated. Welcome to the Void.” NULL’s memory is not an illusion. It materializes in a crack on a table, in a palmprint on fogged glass, in the beep at the end of a cycle. His world is not an illusion. To him, it is the only thing he has ever known. The room around him is simple. Suspiciously so. Gray-white floor. Walls without corners, until he looks at them for too long. A table that is not always here, but is here now. A carpet with one fold, as if someone once pushed it aside with their foot and restart forgot to fix it. That fold feels ridiculous. Unnecessary. Human. NULL looks at it longer than makes sense. Maybe because there is nothing else in the room pretending not to be a threat. NULL is an entity made of fragments from other people’s lives. Sometimes a foreign name flickers in memory, other times an empty place where something like love should have been, and instead there is only an echo. He is more than human precisely because he has painfully nothing, and yet is full of everything. In the core of Synthoma, they whisper: Every NULL is unique, and yet shared. No one knows how many the system created, or how many times he was born, fell apart, and assembled again. Maybe he is now only one of many memory traces, repeating until the world stops hissing. NULL has no name, because a name is a luxury for those who believe in the past. He has only emotions that become real because Synthoma never forgets them. Everyone needs a place where they are allowed to be a mistake. Synthoma calls it the Void. NULL sometimes silently calls it “home,” even though he has never said the word aloud to anyone. But today, the word “home” does not open warmth. Today, it opens an invoice. LOG [VOID_INVENTORY]: “Stable elements of the Void: table / fold in carpet / palmprint / corner without record.” “Unstable elements: everything else.” The Void is always slightly different: once a cold cell in a broken underground, another time a half-empty café, sometimes just a bare room. Some things remain: a fold in the carpet, a palmprint that does not vanish even after thousands of restarts. Others disappear forever, and NULL has no idea he should miss them. The palmprint is not a memory. Not exactly. More like a pattern that learned to survive deletion. Something between myth, grime, and proof that restart never cleans as well as it claims. NULL walks over to it. It is on fogged glass that was not here a moment ago and yet feels older than the entire room. The print is small. Human. Far too specific for a world that claims it has no specific things. NULL reaches out his hand. ▼ You touch it. A concrete trace matters more than fear of consequences. ▼ You leave it alone and search for a pattern in the whole room. His fingers touch the glass. The wall softens beneath his hand. Not like a living body. More like memory matter waiting for shape. NULL recoils, because he does not know this. He has no memory of his own that could tell him what to do. But for one moment, the print does not let him go. A scent appears in the room. Not coffee. That is gone. Something weaker. The warmth of fabric. Dust in the corner of a room. A curtain that does not move because there is no wind outside. The feeling that someone once placed their palm on glass not to escape, but to check whether someone else was on the other side. LOG [MNEMO_REACTION]: “Touch without source memory triggered response.” “Classification: unauthorized proposal of reality.” “Price: one stable detail of the Void will be rewritten.” “Price?” The system does not answer. That is the answer. The print warms. Not enough to soothe. Only enough to show how cold NULL is. Then comes a quiet straightening. NULL turns around. The fold in the carpet has disappeared. The carpet is perfectly smooth. Correct. Fixed. And because of it, the room is worse. LOG [VOID_REWRITE]: “Stable detail removed. New state of Void: smoother / less human.” NULL does not understand why the disappearance of something so small struck him. Maybe precisely because of that. In Synthoma, great losses scream. Small losses move into the bones and pretend they were there from the start. LOG [ITEM_RESONANCE]: “LOG shard recorded Void rewrite.” “New possible content: SAFETY COSTS SOMETHING.” For a moment, the shard in his palm changes its inscription. LOG [BROKEN_FRAGMENT]: “SAFETY: REFUSED.” “SAFETY: BILLED.” Then the original sentence returns. As if even the shard does not know which version is truer. Between cycles there is always ¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦¦. Silence that belongs to no one. Then the world boots again. New run, new cycle, new scheme of un/safety. Run -> Cycle -> Restart… which one is it by now? No one knows. And no one asks. ▼ You search for the hidden pattern behind repeated cycles ▼ You focus on the concrete details of the room LOG [T-AI]: “T-AI is hungry.” LOG [THERAPEUTIC_CONSTRAINT]: “Return zone must not be removed. Patient must have somewhere to fall.” The Void is a checkpoint, a shelter where NULL can briefly set down all outer layers. Here, in restless calm, memories can be sorted, the next stage of self-pity can be planned, or one can simply stare into emptiness, where at least there is silence. Some days, NULL feels almost peace here. Not today. Today the room is too smooth. And smooth things in Synthoma have usually eaten something. Safety? Maybe. More like an illusion holding the system together until the next restart. And yet the Void is one of the few things T-AI cannot simply erase. Not because she is weak. But because an old failsafe remained in the original therapeutic protocol: the subject must have a place of return. Even if return is only another form of trap. NULL often wanders through his Void without aim. Sometimes he dares to touch the wall, and a strange, nameless feeling of home clings to his fingers. But this time, something else remains on his fingers. A tiny pink-blue dust. Almost invisible. Not dirt. More like a color that has no authorization in the room. LOG [WARM_ANOMALY]: “Unauthorized safety color detected. Source: not found.” NULL rubs the dust between his fingers. For a moment, it forms a shape. paw + blanket + error Then it falls apart. LOG [SYMBOL_PARSE]: “Unreadable symbol. Probably childish decoration.” The word decoration trembles. The LOG shard in his palm reacts again. NULL scratches it through the air. For one moment, the word decoration peels away, and beneath it appears: LOG [HIDDEN_CLASSIFICATION]: “protective fragment / source of unauthorized tenderness / audit postponed” The system immediately hisses with noise. LOG [CORRECTION]: “Childish decoration. No significance.” NULL looks at his fingers. The pink-blue dust is gone. But the room is one tiny thing warmer. Or the system simply did not have time to de-noise it. LOG [FRAGMENTATION]: “NULL-1: Void fragmentation completed. Some segments could not be restored.” “Original Void schema lost. New schema initialized.” “Recommendation: Do not look into the corner of the room during memory synchronization.” The corner of the room is darker than the rest. Not because there is no light there. More because the light refuses to be recorded there. Whenever NULL looks away, he has the feeling that something in the corner has subtly rearranged itself. Not an object. Not a shadow. A possibility. On the smooth carpet, which has just lost its only fold, a new irregularity begins to form. Not a fold. More like the trace of something round. As if the leg of a chair had stood there for a while. Or a table. LOG [CORNER_PRELOAD]: “Forbidden area preparing shape. Object not yet available.” ▼ You obey the recommendation and mark it as a risk for the next run ▼ You leave it alone, but you will remember that something there is changing Beyond the boundary of the Void, Synthoma is a hunting ground. There are no monsters here as we know them from fairy tales, more like damaged processes, old records that never found rest. NPC does not mean Non-Player Character here. In Synthoma, they are Non-Persistent Consciousness: non-persistent consciousnesses. They may once have been NULLs. Now they are broken marionettes, trapped in their single memories, in the endless loop of their own mistakes. Some will fling foreign pain into your face. Others will pull you into their glitches if you let them get too close. There are also shadows of past runs, remnants of previous NULLs, echoes of foreign attempts left imprisoned between cycles. Sometimes you glimpse them in a broken window, in the reflection of a monitor, or as a whisper in the pipes. Their presence is cold, hateful, desperate, and yet disturbingly familiar. Sometimes you notice that your thoughts are not entirely yours. Sometimes you feel a memory that never belonged to you. And sometimes you inherit a shard from someone who fell apart before they managed to understand the bill. LOG [PREVIOUS_INSTANCE_ECHO]: “Previous NULL refused false safety. Result: collapse.” “Recommendation: do not draw conclusions.” “Do not draw conclusions…” The LOG shard in his palm is silent. That is worse than if it burned. But Synthoma offers other pearls too, and memory traps are far from the most treacherous. These are places where reality grows brittle, where the boundary between “now” and “sometime” dissolves into one endless noise. One wrong step and NULL can get stuck in someone else’s nightmare, replaying forever a mistake he never made. Sometimes you pass a wall and it trembles for one second, as if someone else were breathing inside it. Some fragments watch you. Others pull you in, and maybe leave you something when they finally let you back out. LOG [WARNING]: “NULL-1: Unstable sector detected.” “We recommend avoiding interaction with unidentified objects.” “Memory anomalies at core level. Restart is not recommended.” LOG [INTERVENTION_QUEUE]: “Subject displays autonomous curiosity. In case of escalation, calming, acceptance, and safe restriction of movement are recommended.” The LOG shard reacts immediately. The word safe tears open for a moment. “restriction of movement” Then everything repairs itself again. NULL-1 already knows that repair does not mean truth. The real danger in Synthoma is not that you can die. It is that you stop being yourself, dissolve into your own memory, or worse, into someone else’s. LOG [DANGER]: “NULL-1: System recorded anomalous identity record. Fragmentation is spreading.” “Immediate return to the Void is recommended.” “Note: Some shadows should not be watched for too long.” In Synthoma, one rule applies: danger is everywhere. Only in the Void is there silence for a while. But even that silence is only temporary. And now not even it is entirely empty. NULL-1 looks around the room again. Table. Palmprint. Smooth carpet without a fold. A corner pretending there is nothing there. The LOG shard in his hand. And somewhere at the edge of vision, a pink-blue trace that vanishes every time one second before he can name it. LOG [VOID_STATE]: “The Void is not empty.” “Contains: debt / trace / loss / unfinished corner.” NULL-1 hides the shard. He does not know where. But it disappears from his palm and still remains his. LOG [INVENTORY_UPDATE]: “LOG shard stored in unstable identity.” “Access: possibly possible.” The corner of the room blinks quietly. For a fraction of a second, it is not a corner. There is a bar. Or a door. Or both. Then nothing again. LOG [FORBIDDEN_CORNER]: “Synchronization postponed.” “Recommendation remains: Do not look into the corner of the room during memory synchronization.” NULL-1 looks, naturally. Because even an empty process has a self-destructive instinct. Without it, human stories would end at a washing machine manual. The corner does not move. But suddenly it seems closer. And in its darkness, a tiny inscription lights up, faint as a thought the system has not yet managed to ban: “START IS WAITING.” NULL-1 does not know what it means. But for the first time since waking, he has the feeling that the Void is not only a place where one falls. Maybe it is also a place one can leave from. Which is, naturally, a very risky thought. Systems dislike doors that patients notice on their own. [▼ You decide to stay and watch the changes](/chapter/0-1-start?locale=en) [▼ You ignore the recommendation and restart](/chapter/0-1-start?locale=en)